The Month That Knocked The Stuffing Out Of Me.

Well am I glad to see the back of October. I was hit with what I thought was the worst cold I have ever had only to find out 3 weeks later that it was flu. I am still struggling with it now and what with not doing any exercise for 3 weeks it is a struggle to get going again.

If that wasn’t enough October also saw me finding out one of my children is being screened for a form of dyslexia. It’s a hard thing to take in. As a mum you don’t like to think of your own flesh and blood as anything but perfect. I know it isn’t life threatening and there are so many children and families out there with far worse health problems to cope with but it still doesn’t stop my maternal instinct kicking in. I have gone through feeling angry with the school for not spotting it earlier, to beating myself up for being a bad mum for not shouting louder when I knew something wasn’t quite right, to pure relief that my child is now getting the support they need.

Winter is never usually good for me either. I love fresh air and the dark nights usually make me feel like hibernating or at the very least waking up when it’s light and going to bed when it’s dark. I was determined not to be beaten by it this year and invested in a SAD lamp. I can quite honestly say it’s the best thing I ever bought. Waking up to day light is great!

Not that I like dwelling on the woes in my life I also had numerous other stress related activities to deal with in October.

Of course one of these was Cancer Support’s highlight in the events calendar – The Ladies Pink Lunch. Anyone who has ever organised a fundraising event for 200 people will tell you how much work goes on behind the scenes. It was tiring but on the day everything went to plan, the ladies had a fabulous time and over £6,000 were raised.

So why am I telling you all this? Well you know what. I am only human and sometimes life throws you a curve ball and you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.

That light came this morning. I knew I had to get back to doing some exercise. I was worried that if I left it too long I’d go back to wanting to stay in bed till lunch and gong through the whole of winter comfort eating and feeling so lethargic.

I’d arranged my usual Sunday morning jog and was driving to the car park when I received a text. I waited until I parked up and read it. My friend couldn’t make. This has never happened before and up to now I would have just turned round and gone home. Today I knew how much I needed to get back running. I wasn’t worried and just got out of the car and set off.

It wasn’t fast or long and I didn’t jog all of it, but I did it. I didn’t once panic about who saw me or what I looked like. All I was interested in was clearing my head and testing the water with my breathing after having the flu.

One lap was enough for a first run on my own. My fitness levels had obviously reduced but I was fitter than I thought I would be and I did it on my own. One huge step forward and a massive realisation that I need to run to help clear my head.

It is now only 21 days until The Great Yorkshire Stair Climb. I will take part no matter what. I haven’t been my usual sponsorship requesting self, and still have a long way to go to meet my target, but this isn’t just about money. This is my first physical challenge, where I know I won’t be the first and could possibly be one of the slowest but it has helped me become a stronger healthier person.